


Dulling Edges

by StarryNox



Series: FE Femslash Week 2018 [1]
Category: Fire Emblem: Kakusei | Fire Emblem: Awakening
Genre: F/F, FE Femslash Week 2018, anyway i'm late for the prompt day but oh well, but overall supposed to be a healing narrative??, mentions of death and trauma
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-16
Updated: 2018-03-16
Packaged: 2019-04-01 05:26:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,084
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13991427
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StarryNox/pseuds/StarryNox
Summary: She doesn't say that she needs the work as much as it needs doing.FE Femslash Week Day 1: Fire / Anger / Edge





	Dulling Edges

Cordelia has never liked to be idle. Why sit and pass the time away doing nothing when she could instead be honing a new skill or making sure that the lance are organized just right? With her only friend a Shepherd and not a part of the winged knights, she had no reason to idle, anyhow. And perhaps, if she worked hard enough and proved her worth, the veteran pegasus knights might take her into their fold. 

But now she has a new reason not to sit still, to throw herself into her duties, to be _useful_. She could lie to herself and say that she keeps herself busy to prove her worth to her new squadron, the Shepherds, but she knows this to be false. She loves Sumia dearly and thinks the world of her, clumsiness and all, but she knows, too, that commanding officers who favor Sumia's tenacity over her stumbles are unlikely to value her for her work ethic alone. And, even if she did convince herself that her work ethic made her a unique asset to the Shepherds, that damn tactician would come and set her straight without a doubt.

"Are you _sure_ you're not in need of a break, Cordelia?" Robin's lips are pressed into a thin line—a feat in and of its own, as Cordelia has quietly envied the fullness of the Plegian's lips ever since her arrival. Cordelia pushes the thought from her mind and shakes her head. 

"I'm fine. These salves won't inventory themselves, right?" She doesn't say that she needs the work as much as it needs doing. More than it needs doing, really, because she knows Maribelle took stock of them yesterday morning and Frederick three days before that, and they've been lucky enough to avoid any skirmishes in the past few days. But the work is mind-numbing, and she needs it, lest she be haunted day in and day out by the thwip of a bowstring and the shrieks of pegasi shot through and her sisters, some crying to Naga in terror and the rest urging her to go, to flee, to warn the others of what happened here and--   


"Well, I guess that's true. But here, let me help you. You haven't done the bandages yet, right?" And so the tactician takes up position at her side, and Cordelia can't bring herself to explain that she'd rather do it all herself, if only so the work can go longer. "You know, your dedication really is admirable. I don't think anyone works as hard as you, except for Frederick, maybe." Robin shoots her a sidelong grin, her eyes mischievous. "We're not going to have to order you to take breaks, will we?" 

"Oh, there's no need for that, commander." 

"Please, call me Robin." 

"Robin, then," she agrees, but her hands still only moments later. "But, um, won't people get the wrong idea? If I call you Robin, that is." 

"The wrong idea?" The tactician looks puzzled, and Cordelia suddenly feels very, very silly.

"People might think that we're....friends." And she's not sure what to think of that. Her only friend has ever been Sumia, but she'll admit she hasn't been the best of friends since she joined the Shepherds, wrapped up as she is in her own pain. 

"Is that a problem?" Robin looks almost hurt, and that thought alone has Cordelia shaking her head quickly for reasons she can't quite understand. 

"No, no, it's just...I've never had many friends. All the pegasus knights in my unit were veterans. There was no one I could truly call a friend." Though it doesn't make their loss hurt any less, she adds silently. She almost wishes it would. 

"That's..." 

"I don't need any pity," Cordelia interjects quickly. "I grew accustomed to it. And I had my pegasus, Aurora...though I suppose the conversations were a bit one-sided." 

"I'll bet." Robin laughs lightly, and Cordelia finds that she quite likes the sound. "Well, I'd like to be friends. I know it isn't the same as what you've been through, but...the Shepherds are all I have." 

"That's right...Sumia mentioned you had lost all your memories." Robin nodded. "I have to admit...I kind of envy that, in a way. Uh, never mind! Forget I said that. It was insensitive." Having managed to count the last of the salves while they talked, Cordelia all but flees the supply tent, ignoring Robin's call of her name.

She's not sure it's a blessing or a curse that, even after all that, the number of salves is still etched in her mind.

* * *

 

 

She scowls as she bends over a piece of parchment, charcoal in hand. All the duties she'd normally perform in her spare time are currently being attended to by other Shepherds, and she has a strong suspicion that her new friend is the cause. She can't really complain—Robin thinks she's being helpful. And were Cordelia ready, she might use her newfound free time the way the tactician undoubtedly intended her to—to move past the grief she accidentally acknowledged during their last talk. But instead, she holes up in a corner of their encampment, hopes to avoid the tactician, and designs a new javelin.

"Cordelia..." She glances upwards, plastering a smile upon her features at the sight of Robin standing in front of her. Robin shifts from foot to foot unsurely. "You know...if you want to talk about anything...."  Cordelia panics.

"What do you think of this javelin?" She shoves her design under the tactician's nose, and hates the way that the sight of Robin's crinkled nose as she shifts so that she can actually see Cordelia's sketching only makes her more flustered. "I'm not sure about the balance, myself." 

"Er, I'm not really an expert on javelins, but I guess I can try." If nothing else, Cordelia supposes she can be thankful that Robin goes along with it without question. 

And, well, it turns out that Robin knows more about javelins than she thinks. By the time they're done reworking Cordelia's sketch, it's nearly dinnertime, and Cordelia feels much better about the updated design than before. 

* * *

 

 

"Robin, look!" She holds out her new javelin proudly, smiling more genuinely than she has in weeks. "I crafted the javelin we designed." Robin's mouth falls open as she turns the weapon over in her hands.

"Wait, you _made_ this? From scratch?" 

"Of course. Everyone was so complimentary, too. I couldn't have done it without your help."

"Oh, please, I just gave you a couple of pointers. You're the one who went out and learned smithery." Robin shakes her head. "You really are a genius." Cordelia stiffens under the word. _Genius_. "Oh, sorry, I know you're sensitive, about that word." 

"It's all right."

"Not if it hurts you." Cordelia finds herself blinking down at Robin in surprise—the tactician's expression is so earnest that Cordelia ends up looking away in embarrassment. "I should've said something else. I mean, you worked really hard on this, didn't you? And maybe that is a kind of genius, but I didn't have to say it like that. You're talented because you work hard, and it really shows! That's all." 

"Thank you." Cordelia smiles. "I know that's what you mean, but...it's still nice to hear it." Robin's smile is soft and gentle, and Cordelia feels her cheeks grow warm. 

"I know it might not be my place, but...I think your old comrades in the pegasus knights knew it, too." Cordelia can see the barest of red hues peek through the tactician's brown cheeks, but the words spoken leave her with little room to think on that further.

"I know." She feels the sting in her eyes first and the lump in her throat second, and with that, it's as if a dam has broken. "They...despite all the hazing, they decided I was their future. They told me as much when they begged me to flee. They..." She's sure she must look a right mess, with tears dribbling down her cheeks and snot out of her nose, but Robin pulls her into a hug anyway, and Cordelia buries her face into the shorter woman's coat, breathing in the scent of fresh ink and firewood. "They really cared about me, in their own way." 

"Oh, Cordelia..." 

"I wish I had gotten to know them better," she admits. "I wish...I wish I had seen the teasing for what it was, and not what I thought it was. I wish they were still here." 

"I wish they were, too. They'd be proud of you—I'm sure of it." Robin's embrace is just as warm as her words, and Cordelia finds herself only able to nod in reply. "I know we can't replace the sisters you've lost, but we all care about you too, you know? _I_ care about you, and I'll always be here for you." Cordelia pulls away and wipes at her eyes, sniffling even as she smiles. 

"I know, Robin. Thank you." She hiccups and laughs, pressing the palms of her hands more firmly against her eyes as if it might stop more tears from forming. "And....I should thank Sumia, too. For being here." 

"I'm sure she understands."

"Still." At last, her tears come to a stop, even if she's still sniffling. "I promise I won't weep all over you again." Robin laughs, and Cordelia finds herself smiling along with her.

"I hope you don't have to." 

* * *

 

 

She stands on a cliffside, safely across the Feroxi border, her javelin in hand. She feels number than she has in a long time, but then again, who isn't? They've failed, failed at saving their Exalt, and she's left with the cold, quiet knowledge that she's the last member of the Winged Knights left alive. 

"Cordelia?" Robin's voice is hoarse, as it always is these days. Cordelia has noticed that the tactician has barely said a word since she sounded their retreat, since she chased after Chrom in the Midmire, desperately trying to make sure they didn't lose two royals instead of one. Instead, she buried herself under maps and battle plans in a strategy so familiar, but one Cordelia doesn't know how to break. "What are you doing out here? Aren't you cold?"

"I could ask the same of you," she says quietly. Robin only shrugs, pulling her cloak tighter around herself as she steps closer. Cordelia leans into her warmth, briefly. "I'm going to see how far I can throw this javelin."

"Off a cliff?" Even now, she can see Robin's mind at work. It's a comforting sight, and one she has to admit that she's missed. "You'll never get it back."

"That's the idea." She sighs, running her fingers over the patterns she etched into the handle so many months ago. "Seeing it only reminds me of my fallen comrades. I think...it's time for me to say goodbye." Robin cringes. "It isn't your fault, you know. What happened to Phila, and the others." 

"Isn't it?" 

"It isn't," Cordelia reaffirms. "And Her Grace chose to sacrifice herself for us for the same reason the other pegasus knights gave themselves for me. She knew that we are the future of Ylisse." 

"It's hard to argue with you, when you put it that way." 

"Good." Cordelia can't help but feel a little smug about having outwitted the tactician for once. "So...let's say goodbye to the past. Together." Robin hesitates for only a moment before nodding. "Well then, one, two, three..." She throws the javelin with the form her comrades once admired and envied, and she feels the weight on her shoulders sail away with it. From beside her, she can hear Robin's noise of awe.

"That one really flew!" Robin looks excited about such a small thing, and Cordelia finds herself smiling softly in return. 

"Feel any better? I know I do." 

"...yeah, I think so." Robin nods, her expression more at ease than it has been these fast few weeks. "Thanks."

"Anytime." Her hand finds Robin's, and she takes it, linking her fingers with Robin's and giving it a small squeeze. Robin glances up at her, a small smile tugging at her lips, and leans close.

For now, they say their last goodbyes to those that they've lost. Then they will heal, carefully closing wounds both physical and emotional. And later, when the pain has dulled, they will face the future together.

Cordelia rather likes the idea.


End file.
